Greetings all!
Well, it is official. 3 years since my ostomy removal surgery.
Here’s some things I have learned since then:
-A cup of nonfat Greek yogurt is my best friend. EVERY DAY. Also it keeps me full until lunch. Surprising.
-You CAN get 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep. And when you do, you wonder who blew sunshine up your bum.
-Taking gummy vitamins every day makes me feel like a kid in the best way.
-Just because you introduce a food once and your gut says, “Eff you!” doesn’t mean you cannot try it again a few months later with different results.
-Small portions. Chew slowly. Or else you’re gonna have a bad time.
-Peppermint tea+Heating pad=Stomach ache-Be-Gone.
-I hate exercise but I love to walk. It’s easy. I walk everywhere and it feels goooood.
-The sex is still amazing with a j-pouch… 😉
-My saving grace? A good solid water bottle I can carry everywhere.
-Red meat sits in my guts for a couple days then explodes like Mount Vesuvius. EEEEEEEEECH.
-With the above in mind, food really is outstanding.
-You can fart and still be a lady. I promise.
-Beyond a drink of wine or beer, the booze makes me hate my life for two days afterward. Getting drunk is worse (and more dangerous) without a colon. I wouldn’t recommend it. You’re gonna have a bad time.
-Nobody will know your secret unless you tell them.
-It’s great fun to make up ridiculous stories about your surgery scars. Bonus points if listeners believe said stories.
-There is nothing you cannot do.
-I have a great goddamn support system in my family, fiance, and friends.
Blessed. Lucky. All that happy stuff. Real talk? It is about being prepared. As prepared as one can possibility be. EDUCATE OURSELVES ABOUT OUR ILLNESS. We honestly don’t get all the information from health care givers. With the internet at our fingertips and mountains of knowledge at our disposal, it would be downright stupid not to take advantage of learning as much as we can about what we will encounter. Yeah, it’s scary as hell. It’s not what we want to hear. It wasn’t what I wanted to hear but I said, “Well, shit. All right. I have to have this surgery. What does it mean?” Taking those steps to find out more made everything more manageable. I had options; I had ideas; I had questions for my health care providers. They were surprised and pleased I asked them. You can’t know everything there is to know. But having a battle plan before going into the arena is always a good bet. If things went all pear-shaped, I had some answers in my back pocket to play with. When I didn’t follow my own advice or that of my doctors, I floundered. We all screw up, right? Stick with it. Learn from what you did wrong and try something else. I am speaking in generalities because I feel at this point, most of you know what I have dealt with (whether that comes from your own experiences or reading about mine here). Ulcerative colitis changed everything about me. My medical experience taught me how to be an adult damn quick. If you want answers, speak up. Look for them. Going into it blind may sound appealing. “Ignorance is bliss”, after all, eh? Not when it came to my life. I will be in control of how this plays out. Not the disease. There is always a choice. I don’t regret the one I made.
Preachy? Yeah, it is. Not even going to lie there. But true. I get many emails asking for my advice. So there it is. Plain and simple. Educate yourselves. READ. That’s all I did. I read and I tried things out. Check out some of the links of my sidebar to start. The community just keeps growing! Be open with your doctors. If their bedside manner sucks, find a new one. Don’t be afraid to tell them you’re not happy with how they’re treating you. Do something about it. Take control of your life.
Look, Mum, I did it!
You CAN have your cake and eat it too. Make it yourself!
Best of health to all. Be well, my friends. Thank you for stopping by.
Stephanie's Story: How to Evict Your Useless Colon 